Having a beard isn’t always rainbows and unicorns, sometimes there are problems that bearded folk suffer from.
Not everyone will understand these issues as they’re problem only bearded people will understand.
You have pasta at lunch and you smell it for the rest of the day if you’re not careful.
Relative to the last one, looking for food that isn’t messy on menus.
Being unable to celebrate ‘No Shave November’ like anybody else.
I mean, you could pretend you had a shave on Halloween.
Looking like an actual, physical foetus after shaving.
We’ve all been there. Whether it’s because you’ve cut your beard a little too short and need to go all in or whether it’s because you’ve been ordered to clean up your face, it’s indescribable how emasculating it can feel.
Getting your beard hair stuck in your coat’s zipper.
Look at that poor bastard, he’s only gone and ripped half of his beard off. All of that hard work gone. Getting your beard caught in a zip isn’t as bad as this but it illustrates our point pretty well.
Using a drinking fountain and ending up like a drowned rat.
I mean, you may as well just jump into the ocean.
Vomiting and it getting stuck in your beard — particularly bad following a night out.
Don’t worry, that’s just cream in that gent’s beard but I’m sure you now get the idea.
Having a long beard and suffering on a windy day outside.
And you thought your quiff getting caught in the wind was a bad time.
Being forced to use beard dye because of fair hairs.
This is one that effects a lot of us – myself included – and is the reason I often use some brown hair dye, I’m not a big fan of having blonde patches as my facial hair is sparse enough already!
When it’s Halloween and you can’t dress up as anyone that doesn’t have a beard.
Good luck trying to go as a skeleton, you fabulously bearded fool.